Let’s talk about Hard Things.

I’m Brittany and I didn’t have sex for the first time until I was 27 years old, but it wasn’t for lack of trying.

At first, I believed the myriad of doctors who told me I "must not be ready for sex" or that I simply needed to "have a glass of wine" to loosen up. It would be almost 10 years of countless unsuccessful attempts to have penetrative sex, insert a tampon, and undergo an annual gynecological exam before I was finally diagnosed with vaginismus.

In that time, I navigated my twenties like a lot of American women do... except I had an embarrassing secret. Keeping secrets is a very hard thing.

You know what else is hard?

• Shame

• Medical gaslighting

• Misdiagnosis

• Growing up

• Childhood trauma

• Evangelical purity culture

• Penises

• Breaking up

• Divorce

• Vibrators

• Therapy

• Pelvic floor physical therapy

• Tampons

• Dilators

• UTIs

• Yeast infections

• Extramarital affairs

• Sexual harassment

• The orgasm gap

• Publishing a book

I could go on… and in this newsletter, I do.

It’s currently estimated that 1 in 500 women have vaginismus but researchers agree that number is most likely much higher due to shame and stigma that’s often involved when discussing issues in women’s health.

A roadmap through vaginismus diagnosis and treatment didn’t exist when I needed it the most so I decided to create it.

Welcome to Hard Things. There are no secrets here.